Skip to main content

My Gut

I've always listened to my gut. It has never steered me wrong, but this time I chose to ignore it.

I guess I was hoping my instincts were wrong. I wasn't up to another storm in my life, but here I go again.

I don't know the right words to say because I don't understand the battle. I've had a lot of shit come my way in life, but it never pushed me to becoming an addict. It's difficult for me to understand the time and energy put into fixing oneself  to not fight hard enough to stay there. Not every day will be a good day - that's life, but you can't allow the bad days to take you back to that dark place you fought so hard to get out of.

As selfish as it sounds I'm not sure I want to fight this war again. It's really not my fight anyway, but I have been enlisted because of the people that will be effected from the choices that were made. I now have to make a choice if I suit up or walk away. I hope it's short lived, but either way I do know that this battle will not take place in my home. 

All I can do for me is keep the faith and keep moving forward in my life.


Popular posts from this blog

Have An Open Heart

As I was sorting through pictures this morning I came across pictures of my seven-year-old granddaughter with girls that she met for the first time on a 2 day stay in Prescott. I was drawn to the smiles on their faces and the love in their eyes. They met, accepted each other, and acted as if they had been lifelong friends. Oh, how I had forgotten about the innocence of a child. The color of skin, the size of a body, the structure of a face does not matter. They are ready to accept and love unconditionally until we and society teach them differently.

There was nothing but smiles and laughter as they danced, made beaded jewelry, and ate. They made sure that they all were a part of whatever they were participating in. They cared about each other's feelings and made sure that everyone was having fun and was happy. Why is it that we grow to become so obsessed with appearance and behavior of others that we miss seeing the light or the struggles in others?  We're so quick to judge b…