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Showing posts from 2014
Its been awhile since I've sat my butt down in front of the laptop to blog, but today I feel the need to vent.
My vent stems from the Calvin Klein "Plus-Sized" controversy. Honestly, I wanted to vent prior to this when I read some of the ridiculous comments regarding Meghan Trainor's song, All About That Bass.

Here's my first thought. Do you not have anything better to do? There's quite a few things that I think are worthy of gaining attention for women other than their size. I have weighed anywhere from 103 - 143 and guess what - it didn't change who I am as a person. My clothing size may have gone from a 3 to a 9, but I still had the same values and beliefs, and I continued to function in my life without any setbacks. My weight doesn't define who I am as a human being. Also, if you're not directly associated with me my life is really none of your business. I  think that most of the women that don't fit into your cookie cutter mold will tend…

Being a Grandparent

It's Grandparents Day!

I didn't have the pleasure of growing up with my grandparents. I vaguely remember my grandfather on my mothers side, but obviously no real bonding took place since I have no memories of us. But, what I do remember is once I started grade school I longed for grandparents in my life. As I sat hearing other children talk about theirs I became envious. I wanted that experience, and to be honest, I built up some resentment against my parents for not allowing me the opportunity. The whole idea of grandparents was just a fairy tale to me, until I became a grandparent.

I thank God everyday for allowing me to be in the same city with mine, and allowing me to be a part of their lives. I am proud to say that I am a grandmother of 9 beautiful and healthy grandchildren. Each of them bring something different to the table, but everyone of  them has touched my heart and softened my soul over the years. They have helped me in my personal journey in ways that they will …

Sunday

On Sunday I met some people that a glance most of us would assume that we have absolutely nothing in common. But as I spoke to a few I found that we have had very similar life experiences. It was a reminder of how we pass judgment on others strictly by outward appearance. Not one of us is better. In fact, the Lord has a custom designed purpose for each of us. Our looks obviously are different, but many of our souls are carrying the same heavy burdens.
There was an elderly woman that I stood by. She would softly say a few words to me and smile. I started out by smiling back or giving her nod as she spoke to me. As she became more comfortable in sharing her story I asked a few questions and commented on a few things, but I could tell that there was so much more that she wanted to say, but wasn't. I shared some things with her, and she listened, which led her to opening up and sharing  her pain with me. She was struggling with her grandson using drugs and stealing from her. She had …

Giving Thanks During My Storm

I seem to be having a month of questioning answered prayers and hope.

I'm a very positive and optimistic person, but I've had several hopes and prayers lately that have led to disappointment. I see Facebook status about answered prayers, hear conversations on answered prayers, and wonder when will mine be answered?
I had this conversation with a girlfriend of mine yesterday and she expressed she had been feeling the same lately. It just so happened that she had read a devotional that morning which talked about answered prayers during our storms. She asked me if I thank God for the struggles in my life. No, was my reply. I had never thought of thanking God for the rough times, but it makes sense that I should - it's an act in faith. He wants us to learn to walk by faith and not by sight - to have faith during the confusing times. Let's be honest, it's not easy to give thanks during devastation, heartache, or when we feel like our world is caving in. But God wants u…

A Long Season

I've been having a few thoughts lately about acceptance. With age and experience I have learned not to judge or make assumptions, but I seem to be faced daily with people that are bugging the hell out of me. I'm thankful that I'm not as quick to react, but I have to admit that I'm struggling with keeping my mouth shut. I know that I'm not perfect and I don't pretend to be; and I recognize that we are all flawed in some way or another, but attaining a Christlike behavior is a hard walk for me with certain individuals. I have to remind myself that "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." (Phil.4:13) I seem to need that assurance and that divine strength through out my day. Which leads me to the question of why? I know that having a relationship with God doesn't remove my struggles or hardships, but why are these people still in my life? Is this lesson for me, or am I here for them to learn and grow. It becomes difficult to mentor peopl…

Friends For Life!

I woke up thinking about the people in my life. Not my family or acquaintances, I'm talking about my friends that are loyal companions. The one's that are always cheering for you, building you up when you're feeling down, and know how you're feeling with no words exchanged. I'm thankful that I have established a friendship as such, but it doesn't happen automatically. It must be built little by little, but once it's created, you can't separate it. It's similar to a marriage - it involves trust and work. You work through the good and the bad, and through the ups and the downs of the changes that come your way during the relationship. It takes commitment, respect, love, humility, and faith. Lasting relationships involve willingness to give and receive, and not just material items. You need to be the kind of friend that when you say you can count on me whenever you need me, you mean it. You need to be able to give of yourself mutually. We'd all lo…

Cheers To My Nickle

I have always been a super multi-tasker  which I contribute to having five children. I was pretty much forced into mastering it, but after yesterday I think I'm slowly losing my skills.

I was at Safeway grabbing a couple bottles of wine with my daughter when I remembered that I needed five dollars to add to a birthday card. As we rushed through the store I grabbed a couple of other items and ran to the express checker. She greeted me and I responded (that was my mistake) and she never stopped talking after our pleasantries. She told me how great the brand of ground turkey is that I was purchasing, and the expiration date on my can of cranberries as I was diligently working on answering the debit questions on the ATM machine. I was almost to the point of putting in my cash back amount when she asked where I got my shirt from. As I was thinking of where of where I got my shirt and focusing on the debit machine she continued raving about it - which by the way was a simple white t-sh…

Friends

Friendship has always been important to me, but not in the sense of having thousands of friends. I'm very content with a handful that I know are loyal and will always be there for me, and of course I have my go to girlfriend. You know the one - she knows every aspect of your life and will die knowing it. "It takes a long time to grow an old friend." 
- by John Leonard

I have always felt extremely blessed for the friendships that I have, and I work at keeping the relationships because my friends are important to me."What is a friend? A single soul in two bodies." 
- Aristotle  So I have to say that it surprised me when I reached out to an old friend via text the other day and  realized from her response that at some point our relationship had changed. I was no longer on her top ten friend list, and that's okay, but it's a little disappointing that a conversation didn't take place to allow me to know what transpired. If there's no communication the…

Blonde, Files, and Purses

I'm pretty comfortable in my own skin, but I have to admit that I'm still not completely use to sporting my new blonde look. Which brings me to share a little incident that happened to me when I ran to the grocery store yesterday.

I'm in a hurry so I was doing a happy dance in my head when I scored a parking space right up front. I jump out of my car ready to run in when I notice a woman getting into her car staring at me. I slowed my pace and stared back, which made her slightly uncomfortable, but not enough to stop. So now I have an attitude...I'm standing up straighter, making eye contact with her, along with having a conversation about her in my head stating that obviously she's shocked to see a black blonde woman, when suddenly I hear something hit the pavement. At that moment I understood it all.

I had bought a plastic file holder a few days ago for my car because naturally I need my car organized. As I climbed in my car to leave for the store it I decided t…

Younique Moisturizing Gel

Working On A New Chapter...

I'm excited about a new venture in my life! It's not a venture that will replace what I'm currently doing because I love doing my Murraytalk Workshops inspiring and coaching individuals on working towards becoming the best that they can possibly be. This is more of a side gig because I have to stay busy - ( I'm sure there's medication for that) it's something that has also been a big part of my life - beauty. I've been in the fashion/beauty industry for approximately 30 years and I have loved all of it. I've had a taste of pretty much everything in the industry from wardrobe for fashion shoots and fashion shows, commercial work, print work, designer, and a boutique owner, and I  have loved it all! But, as many of you know I finally retired from my clothing sales with the exception of my Murraytalk T-shirts...they will live on forever! I was toying with what I was going to do and praying about what I should do when recently I came across Younique. www.y…

Thank You Emma

I learned something about myself when the grey hairs started creeping in quicker and quicker - I'm a little vain. Initially I thought I could embrace it, but I wasn't getting the beautiful white head of hair that I could love. Seeing the grey at my roots and along the side by my ears just wasn't working for me, so I decided to fight it with going blonde.



I had scheduled my appointment a week before I went to Vegas, which gave me too much time to think about my transformation. I'm much better at being spontaneous when I want a drastic change - too much thought leads me to anxiety. I came home with a list of reasons not to do it. Such as, what if my skin color is too dark, what if it ends up orange or yellow, what if I end up bald? I received confirmation through this on how hard change really is, so I knew that I had to face my fears or there would be no change. This holds true to every thing in life - we can't get different results by doing the same thing. So a bl…

Sleep

I wrote yesterday on how I go to Vegas to get a goodnight sleep. Today I want to share with you what it's like to try and sleep in my house.

My home only has 4 bedrooms and they're fairly close to one another, so for a light sleeper like myself you tend to hear every little sound. So lets begin with my room. I have a 14 year old Pekingese that has always suffered from depression when I leave. I get home yesterday from two days of being away and learn that she hasn't eaten, can't walk, and she's staring at me with those I just want to die eyes. I know her game so I acknowledge her, comfort her, and I'm off to do other things. But my husband is thinking that she really is going to die and actually states that she needs to be in hospice. He attempts to feed her and does her usual routine of putting her on our bed until 9:30 pm. Not tonight! She gets to sleep in our bed all night. Let me remind you - she's 14, so weird sounds come out of her, and she has missi…

Vegas Fun...

I believe most people go to Vegas to gamble and party, but for me I go mainly to have a good night sleep along with a little gambling. I'm really not a Vegas kind of girl, but The Cosmopolitan continues to comp rooms for me so I continue to go.In fact, as soon as we got home there's an email from them offering two free nights for June or July.( I think we need to quit using our player card) It's not that I don't appreciate the offers, it's just not a place that I can frequent every month.
http://www.cosmopolitanlasvegas.com/stay/rooms-and-suites.aspx We had one of their Terrace Suites on the 69th floor this time with a beautiful view of the city. I decided I could probably be happy and content living in a little high rise overlooking a city, but not in Vegas.


As usual I had my typical bad experience with food. I don't eat out much so maybe that's part of the problem, but I didn't have one good meal that I can brag about. All of the reviews for the Wicke…

Do I Really Want To Know...

I've been busy doing my thing in life when suddenly the urge to find out information regarding what percentage of Indian I am and what tribe I came from was consuming my thoughts. I know very little about my family history and never had too much interest in it, but lately its been on my mind along with some interesting events that tie in with it all.

I called a lab in Tempe a few weeks ago for testing - that weekend I received a call from my cousin in DC. He started the conversation by telling me family last names that I wasn't aware of, and asked if I knew that my grandmother on my fathers side was part Indian. I thought his timing was a bit interesting so I spoke to my niece about it - we both came to the conclusion that God has a plan. What the plan is I haven't figured out yet, but I definitely believe it's His doing. Furthermore, on Tuesday this week I received a phone call from my sister in LA. Its probably been 12 years since we spoke so the call was definitely…

Happy Teacher Appreciation Week

Happy Teacher Appreciation Week!

Teacher Appreciation Week is May 5-9th. It's a time to acknowledge and give thanks to our teachers. As we all know teachers have a big influence on our children - beginning with our preschoolers. I feel that many of us forget how fortunate and blessed we are to have a good teacher in the lives of our children. I for one have been blessed for many years with an amazing preschool teacher. Denise Germroth (Homespun) has blessed my children and my grandchildren for 25 years. She goes beyond the academics that they need for kindergarten- they also learn kindness and love through Denise's wonderful bible based teaching and her love for children. I am overjoyed that she has touched their lives and left lifetime memories with each of them. Happy Teacher Appreciation Denise! You're the best...I appreciate all that you do to bless the lives of our little ones.
Take time this week to remember that special teacher in your life.
"A good teacher is …

My Ministry

In 1989 I was sitting in a church in Scottsdale, AZ  when in the middle of service the pastor stopped and said, "God has a message for someone in here today." It was me! He had several messages for me that morning, but the one that I have always held on to is that I was going to have a ministry of children. For many years I questioned what that meant since my plan for my life wasn't about having a ministry of children. Honestly, I fought with the idea of staying home with my grandchildren and had struggled with the feeling that I was becoming my mother, but over the years I decided that I needed to just accept Gods plan for me. So yesterday a new addition was added to my ministry of children and to our family - grandchild number 9 blessed our family with his entrance into our world. "Having a baby is a life-changer. It gives you a whole other perspective on why you wake up every day."  -Taylor Hanson



God is good!



Have a blessed day...be kind!

Say Something...

I always seem to hear this song when I'm on the verge of giving up on a family member struggling with addiction. I'm a fighter and a believer in change, so when I get the feeling that I need to walk away, I'm having one of those days.

I know this song isn't talking about walking away from someone that's an addict, but most of the lyrics remind me of my battle with an addict. When Christina sings, "And I'm feeling so small It was over my head I know nothing at all"  That is how I feel about addiction...I don't fully understand the struggle, and believe me I've tried, but really I know nothing at all except how it affects me and my family. I don't understand getting sober, relapsing, and repeat. When is it going to be just getting sober?
I can also relate to the lyrics, "Say something, I'm giving up on you I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you" I feel a bit defeated with all of this - nothing I say or do seems to make a…
When I found out that today is National Superhero Day it made me think - if I could have superhero powers what kind of superhero powers would I want. Of course my powers would be for good and not evil because I'm all about doing the right thing. (I'm not even sure if there's such a thing as evil superheros.)

Anyway, after some thought I decided I would want the power to heal. Not just the sick, but the broken as well. I would want to touch the lives of those that have lost all hope. Sometimes it takes just a glimpse of light for people to see past their darkness. I want to be that light. Also, on a lighter note... I would totally rock that cape!

I decided to ask my 4 year old  granddaughter what her superhero powers would be and she said, " I want to be Bat Girl so I can fix houses for people to live."  I like her superpowers as well.

Why not live life with the thought of  having superhero powers. We all have the ability to do amazing things for people and our w…

Obey Your Mom and Dad...

Happy Thursday!

Give me Strength...

I wasn't going to blog today because I didn't want to express everything that's in my head - most of it isn't nice. I prayed for God to give me strength to get through this day, and that my words would be a reflection of his love. I need to reboot my thought process today...trying to bite my tongue is a challenge for me.  
I did come to the conclusion that I can no longer have people in my life that irritate/ frustrate me to the point of me wanting to get a little crazy on them. For one, it's not fair to me. Although, I take full responsibility for me allowing them to take advantage of my kindness, but now it's time to shut it down. 
I have to remind myself that some people enjoy playing the part of the martyr, some enjoy staying stuck, and some are just liars. If that's your thing, perfect! Just exclude me..I don't want to be on that ride with you.
When people choose to live a certain way they also need to learn to live with the consequences of their …
I closed shop on Poshmark!

Thank you to everyone that purchased and shared my listings. It was a fun ride...I met some amazing women from all over the United States, but I need to keep my focus on my Murraytalk Workshops, Murraytalk T-shirts, and my outreach programs at this time.

It actually feels great bagging up all my shoes, clothing, and accessories to donate. I'm walking forward in faith with all of this - greater things are coming my way.

“Faith is believing that God is going to take you places before you even get there.”  - Matthew Barnett

Have a blessed day and be a blessing to someone,

Peace, love, & hugs!
Happy Easter!

Yesterday two of my daughters, one grandchild, and a co-worker went to Tempe to help serve food at Moeur Park. Several church groups and individuals have been doing this every Saturday for several years.

As I sat waiting for the food to arrive I watched as the line of people continued to grow as they entered from different directions of the park. At a glance I wouldn't guess that some of them would need food. For me my thought process was that they would all be homeless, but that wasn't the case. Some have jobs, some have a place to live, but there's not enough money for food. It's sad and ridiculous to me that in 2014 hunger still exists.
"Why should there be hunger and privation in any land, in any city, at any table when [we have] the resources and the scientific know-how to provide all [hu]mankind with the basic necessities of life? ... There is no deficit in human resources; the deficit is in human will."
— Dr. Martin Luther King Jr
While …
I find it interesting that people place so much value on weight.

I've lost ten pounds due to dental work. I'm sure I needed to lose it, but that weight loss didn't change who I am, but it is the first thing mentioned in a conversation. I don't value who I am or anyone else based on their outward appearance. Being thin or overweight doesn't change the true essence of who someone is. If I'm an asshole when I'm fat chances are I'm going to be a skinny asshole as well.

It's understandable why so many people have body image issues, but I find it unacceptable that people develop an opinion based on someones weight. That my friends is called judging. I am judged everyday because of the color of my skin - I don't want to add being judged by my weight to the list. And for those of you that are ready to get defensive and argue about being healthy...I understand that, but I'm not talking about being healthy. I'm talking about people basing their o…
I've refrained this week from expressing what I really feel to someone that has stumbled. I know that they're not in the right state of mind to really hear what I'm saying so the conversation would really be about how I'm feeling at the moment, and it's not about me. Although I am affected by the choices made I'm not the one in the battle.

I know how hard it was and how long it took for me to fix myself so I understand the struggle. But it gets tiresome and old for those involved after awhile. It stirs up too many emotions and robs me of sleep.

I hate thinking that maybe this is what he wants for his life. I hope that he's just a little fearful of change right now. I know that fear is a natural reaction when you begin to acknowledge your truth. It's much easier to run and numb yourself versus dealing with all the emotions and acknowledge what's keeping you stuck.

All that I can do is let go and pray that everything he's learned will resurface a…

Happy Birthday Denise!

Happy Happy Birthday Denise!

When we met in 1989 who knew 25 years later you would still be a huge part of my life.

You have exceeded the definition of friendship. You have always supported my endeavors and have been my rock through some of my toughest times. Not once have I ever felt judged by you - you have always accepted me as I am. You have touched my life, my children and grandchildren.We are blessed and grateful to have you in our life.

I pray that I'm blessed with many more years of you being my friend. When life throws me a curve ball you make it a little easier to handle - you continue to add joy to my journey in life. Thank you for being you!

Cheers to a fabulous day my friend...love you!










Emotions...

I know you're probably tired of me sharing songs that are stuck in my head, but oh well...here you go!

Enjoy!
I had a really good conversation on Sunday with a group regarding sobriety, speaking our truth, and communicating when you need help.

It made me think about myself because I have an addictive personality and I was hearing behavior patterns that I have. I've learned to control my impulses over the years so they don't become obsessive and unhealthy for me. Also, my choice of addiction wasn't as problematic as drugs or alcohol. I was addicted to working out. I worked out like a crazy woman for several years. I'd start my morning teaching high impact aerobics, from there I'd go to an aerobic class so I could really workout - next to an hour choreographing class, and on to the weight room. Once I was home I'd put in a minimum of 3 hours putting aerobic dance routines together, and then my husband and I would hit the gym together at night for 1-2 hours of a workout. I did this 7 days a week - working out was my drug. It made me not have to think about anything else,…
I'm tired of life giving me lemons!

Let me begin by saying that I am very thankful for my life and feel extremely blessed with each new day, but today my truth is, I'm tired and don't want the lemons!

There are family members and people that I'm close to heading towards a downhill spiral. I see it happening and there's not a whole lot that I can do about it. But that doesn't stop me from thinking about it and praying like a crazy woman. Because their life is heading in the wrong direction I feel like I'm the one being hit by lemons because it will disturb my personal world which will produce extreme amounts of lemons for me.(I know it's not all about me) Before I continue let me apologize for all of the lemon lingo. I typically don't measure my life by lemons, but I woke up thinking of the old saying, "When life gives you lemons make lemonade," so I'm running with it.

I know that everything we experience in life is a learning tool, bu…

This Is Life

When I came across this the sign that says Life U R Here it reminded me of a recent conversation that I had with my husband and my good friend Denise.

It seem like at least 3 times out of the year I ask myself  "Is this what my life is suppose to be - what's my purpose?"  I can't help but wonder sometimes if this is it...not complaining, just curious.

I'm not sure why I go there since I just go with the flow having  faith that I'm walking in the right direction. I have confidence that someday it will all make sense. I guess the bigger question is, when is my someday coming? I know we all have struggles and we all experience the ups and downs of life - I'm just exhausted of the ups and down of an addict. Is this always going to be my life?

 I know I'm not alone since I have several friends my age and older raising their grandchildren, dealing with their adult children's drug/alcohol addiction, and putting their life on hold. They have days of ques…

What Happened To Chivalry, Caring & Kindness

I know that I've complained about this before, but what has happened to chivalry and simple kindness?

Yesterday I went to Target to buy a gift for a baby shower. The gift was both large and heavy and as usual there was no one near to help. I know they have red phones everywhere to get help, but I decided to do it on my own. So with a few minutes of creative maneuvering I managed to get it in the cart. But, what I didn't think of was how I would get it out of the cart and into the back of my truck. As I struggled trying to get it out I noticed several men that drove past looking at me, and one that walked right beside me talking to his girlfriend. Are you frickin kidding me! I'm a woman and I offer assistance when I see someone in need. Needless to say, I managed to get it out. (Yes, I am woman hear me roar )

What has happened? Have we become too self - absorbed or are people just rude?  I see a lot of rudeness happening in the run of my day. I see it at preschool, on tele…

It's Stuck In My Head...

I can't seem to get this song out of my head (by the Lumineers )so I thought I'd share so it can be stuck in yours as well.

Have an awesome day...think happy thoughts!


Life is Beautiful

Life is beautiful, but you need to take time to smell the roses.

I've never put much thought into that cliche before, but it really is true. I know so many people that need to take time to appreciate a situation or slow down and pay attention to what is going on around them. They're too busy to enjoy life.

I have always prided myself in taking time to recognize Gods gifts, but as I walked with my 4 year old granddaughter around my neighborhood yesterday she pointed out things that I saw, but was too busy to really see.

We actually walked by several rose gardens which I admired as I was walking towards them, but she saw the variety of colors, how large they were, the beautiful scent that was coming from them - she saw how beautiful they really were. She wanted to stop and look at them close up, so we stood admiring them for several minutes. As we talked about rose bushes our conversation reminded me of how much I love roses. I forgot how I loved having them in my yard and how …

Never Forget...

“Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.”
― George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones
 Remember that you are love, abundance and joy.

I think life gets so busy that we tend to get lost in it slowly forgetting who we really are. We forget that we were created to fulfill a very special purpose - not created to just exist.

We need remember that we are enough as we are and nothing can prove otherwise.

Today journal your strengths, your passions, and your loves to remind yourself of who you really are.

Peace, love, & joy!




Creating Memories

The guys went camping and the girls had a slumber party!

We had a great night filled with junk food and fun. We made cupcakes, hotdogs, pizza, and had an assortment of chips and candy. Our drinks were rootbeer and orangesicle floats with mustache straws to add to the fun.


We started off with with games. The first one was Twister Moves - not as fun as the original Twister, but we tried. Next, How Well Do You Know Me. I typed up 20 questions and put everyone's name on the paper and passed them out. No one knew who had their name until the end. I also typed up titles of movies, songs, and tv shows...cut them out, folded them and placed them in a can. We split up into teams and had 60 seconds to give clues and guess. Our last game was several rounds of Catch Phrase.

For all of you that know us Murray Girls you know we can't end a party without having a dance competition. So we picked our dance team, and had a few minutes to practice. My team had a few pillow fights in between pra…

Party Time!

Today I'm preparing for a slumber party that I'm hosting Saturday with all the girls in the family.

When I asked my 7th grade granddaughter if she wanted to have a slumber party, her response was, What's that?" We both had a look of confusion on our face until I responded with, " sleepover?"  I wasn't sure if that was what they're calling it these days since me using the words slumber party was like I spoke a foreign language to her, but she said, "Oh, OK!"  I   have to admit for a brief moment I actually felt old. Although, I am doing it old school with charades, twister, junk food, old movies, old music, and a possible pillow fight! Yup! I'm taking it back.

This party has an age range of 4 - 55...wish me luck!

Peace, Love & Hug!


I watched a touching video today about an 11 year old girl and her father.
http://www.sunnyskyz.com/good-news/610/Dying-Father-Sees-His-11-Year-Old-Down-The-isle

I posted it on my facebook (Murraytalk), but it's such a beautiful story and video I wanted to share it on my blog in hopes of it reaching more people.



Enjoy!


We all overthink at times, but it becomes a problem when overthinking starts getting in the way of us making good decisions or causes undue worry.

I've spent the past five days witnessing how overthinking can strip a person of their happiness. What started out as a simple thought, turned into a mountain of thoughts which triggered some memories and led to a downward spiral. It created a stage of self - hatred and problems that weren't there.

I'm hoping and praying that the negative thoughts are slowly being chiseled down. You can't allow overthinking to consume your mind. It robs your sleep, steals your happiness, and paralyzes your thought process. It becomes a war in your head.

Think happy thoughts! I know that's easier said than done, but practice, practice, practice! When you think something positive everyday throughout the day, eventually the happy thoughts will come naturally.
 "We are addicted to our thoughts. We cannot change anything if we cannot cha…