Murraytalk

I always seem to hear this song when I'm on the verge of giving up on a family member struggling with addiction. I'm a fighter and a believer in change, so when I get the feeling that I need to walk away, I'm having one of those days. I know this song isn't talking about walking away from someone that's an addict, but most of the lyrics remind me of my battle with an addict. When Christina sings, "And I'm feeling so small It was over my head I know nothing at all"   That is how I feel about addiction...I don't fully understand the struggle, and believe me I've tried, but really I know nothing at all except how it affects me and my family. I don't understand getting sober, relapsing, and repeat. When is it going to be just getting sober? I can also relate to the lyrics, "Say something, I'm giving up on you I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you" I feel a bit defeated with all of this - nothing I say or do seems to ...

When I found out that today is National Superhero Day it made me think - if I could have superhero powers what kind of superhero powers would I want. Of course my powers would be for good and not evil because I'm all about doing the right thing. (I'm not even sure if there's such a thing as evil superheros.) Anyway, after some thought I decided I would want the power to heal. Not just the sick, but the broken as well. I would want to touch the lives of those that have lost all hope. Sometimes it takes just a glimpse of light for people to see past their darkness. I want to be that light. Also, on a lighter note... I would totally rock that cape! I decided to ask my 4 year old  granddaughter what her superhero powers would be and she said, " I want to be Bat Girl so I can fix houses for people to live."  I like her superpowers as well. Why not live life with the thought of  having superhero powers. We all have the ability to do amazing things for people ...

Happy Thursday!

I wasn't going to blog today because I didn't want to express everything that's in my head - most of it isn't nice. I prayed for God to give me strength to get through this day, and that my words would be a reflection of his love. I need to reboot my thought process today...trying to bite my tongue is a challenge for me.   I did come to the conclusion that I can no longer have people in my life that irritate/ frustrate me to the point of me wanting to get a little crazy on them. For one, it's not fair to me. Although, I take full responsibility for me allowing them to take advantage of my kindness, but now it's time to shut it down.  I have to remind myself that some people enjoy playing the part of the martyr, some enjoy staying stuck, and some are just liars. If that's your thing, perfect! Just exclude me..I don't want to be on that ride with you. When people choose to live a certain way they also need to learn to live with the ...

I closed shop on Poshmark! Thank you to everyone that purchased and shared my listings. It was a fun ride...I met some amazing women from all over the United States, but I need to keep my focus on my Murraytalk Workshops, Murraytalk T-shirts, and my outreach programs at this time. It actually feels great bagging up all my shoes, clothing, and accessories to donate. I'm walking forward in faith with all of this - greater things are coming my way. “Faith is believing that God is going to take you places before you even get there.”  - Matthew Barnett Have a blessed day and be a blessing to someone, Peace, love, & hugs!

Happy Easter! Yesterday two of my daughters, one grandchild, and a co-worker went to Tempe to help serve food at Moeur Park. Several church groups and individuals have been doing this every Saturday for several years. As I sat waiting for the food to arrive I watched as the line of people continued to grow as they entered from different directions of the park. At a glance I wouldn't guess that some of them would need food. For me my thought process was that they would all be homeless, but that wasn't the case. Some have jobs, some have a place to live, but there's not enough money for food. It's sad and ridiculous to me that in 2014 hunger still exists. "Why should there be hunger and privation in any land, in any city, at any table when [we have] the resources and the scientific know-how to provide all [hu]mankind with the basic necessities of life? ... There is no deficit in human resources; the deficit is in human will." — Dr. Martin Luther K...

I find it interesting that people place so much value on weight. I've lost ten pounds due to dental work. I'm sure I needed to lose it, but that weight loss didn't change who I am, but it is the first thing mentioned in a conversation. I don't value who I am or anyone else based on their outward appearance. Being thin or overweight doesn't change the true essence of who someone is. If I'm an asshole when I'm fat chances are I'm going to be a skinny asshole as well. It's understandable why so many people have body image issues, but I find it unacceptable that people develop an opinion based on someones weight. That my friends is called judging. I am judged everyday because of the color of my skin - I don't want to add being judged by my weight to the list. And for those of you that are ready to get defensive and argue about being healthy...I understand that, but I'm not talking about being healthy. I'm talking about people basing thei...

I've refrained this week from expressing what I really feel to someone that has stumbled. I know that they're not in the right state of mind to really hear what I'm saying so the conversation would really be about how I'm feeling at the moment, and it's not about me. Although I am affected by the choices made I'm not the one in the battle. I know how hard it was and how long it took for me to fix myself so I understand the struggle. But it gets tiresome and old for those involved after awhile. It stirs up too many emotions and robs me of sleep. I hate thinking that maybe this is what he wants for his life. I hope that he's just a little fearful of change right now. I know that fear is a natural reaction when you begin to acknowledge your truth. It's much easier to run and numb yourself versus dealing with all the emotions and acknowledge what's keeping you stuck. All that I can do is let go and pray that everything he's learned will re...

 Happy Happy Birthday Denise! When we met in 1989 who knew 25 years later you would still be a huge part of my life. You have exceeded the definition of friendship. You have always supported my endeavors and have been my rock through some of my toughest times. Not once have I ever felt judged by you - you have always accepted me as I am. You have touched my life, my children and grandchildren.We are blessed and grateful to have you in our life. I pray that I'm blessed with many more years of you being my friend. When life throws me a curve ball you make it a little easier to handle - you continue to add joy to my journey in life. Thank you for being you! Cheers to a fabulous day my friend...love you!

I know you're probably tired of me sharing songs that are stuck in my head, but oh well...here you go! Enjoy!

I had a really good conversation on Sunday with a group regarding sobriety, speaking our truth, and communicating when you need help. It made me think about myself because I have an addictive personality and I was hearing behavior patterns that I have. I've learned to control my impulses over the years so they don't become obsessive and unhealthy for me. Also, my choice of addiction wasn't as problematic as drugs or alcohol. I was addicted to working out. I worked out like a crazy woman for several years. I'd start my morning teaching high impact aerobics, from there I'd go to an aerobic class so I could really workout - next to an hour choreographing class, and on to the weight room. Once I was home I'd put in a minimum of 3 hours putting aerobic dance routines together, and then my husband and I would hit the gym together at night for 1-2 hours of a workout. I did this 7 days a week - working out was my drug. It made me not have to think about anything e...

I'm tired of life giving me lemons! Let me begin by saying that I am very thankful for my life and feel extremely blessed with each new day, but today my truth is, I'm tired and don't want the lemons! There are family members and people that I'm close to heading towards a downhill spiral. I see it happening and there's not a whole lot that I can do about it. But that doesn't stop me from thinking about it and praying like a crazy woman. Because their life is heading in the wrong direction I feel like I'm the one being hit by lemons because it will disturb my personal world which will produce extreme amounts of lemons for me.(I know it's not all about me) Before I continue let me apologize for all of the lemon lingo. I typically don't measure my life by lemons, but I woke up thinking of the old saying, "When life gives you lemons make lemonade," so I'm running with it. I know that everything we experience in life is a learning...

When I came across this the sign that says  Life U R Here  it reminded me of a recent conversation that I had with my husband and my good friend Denise. It seem like at least 3 times out of the year I ask myself  "Is this what my life is suppose to be - what's my purpose?"  I can't help but wonder sometimes if this is it...not complaining, just curious. I'm not sure why I go there since I just go with the flow having  faith that I'm walking in the right direction. I have confidence that someday it will all make sense. I guess the bigger question is, when is my someday coming? I know we all have struggles and we all experience the ups and downs of life - I'm just exhausted of the ups and down of an addict. Is this always going to be my life?  I know I'm not alone since I have several friends my age and older raising their grandchildren, dealing with their adult children's drug/alcohol addiction, and putting their life on hold. They have d...

I know that I've complained about this before, but what has happened to chivalry and simple kindness? Yesterday I went to Target to buy a gift for a baby shower. The gift was both large and heavy and as usual there was no one near to help. I know they have red phones everywhere to get help, but I decided to do it on my own. So with a few minutes of creative maneuvering I managed to get it in the cart. But, what I didn't think of was how I would get it out of the cart and into the back of my truck. As I struggled trying to get it out I noticed several men that drove past looking at me, and one that walked right beside me talking to his girlfriend. Are you frickin kidding me! I'm a woman and I offer assistance when I see someone in need. Needless to say, I managed to get it out. (Yes, I am woman hear me roar ) What has happened? Have we become too self - absorbed or are people just rude?  I see a lot of rudeness happening in the run of my day. I see it at preschool, on t...

I can't seem to get this song out of my head (by the Lumineers )so I thought I'd share so it can be stuck in yours as well. Have an awesome day...think happy thoughts!

Life is beautiful, but you need to take time to smell the roses. I've never put much thought into that cliche before, but it really is true. I know so many people that need to take time to appreciate a situation or slow down and pay attention to what is going on around them. They're too busy to enjoy life. I have always prided myself in taking time to recognize Gods gifts, but as I walked with my 4 year old granddaughter around my neighborhood yesterday she pointed out things that I saw, but was too busy to really see. We actually walked by several rose gardens which I admired as I was walking towards them, but she saw the variety of colors, how large they were, the beautiful scent that was coming from them - she saw how beautiful they really were. She wanted to stop and look at them close up, so we stood admiring them for several minutes. As we talked about rose bushes our conversation reminded me of how much I love roses. I forgot how I loved having t...

 “Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.” ― George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones  Remember that you are love, abundance and joy. I think life gets so busy that we tend to get lost in it slowly forgetting who we really are. We forget that we were created to fulfill a very special purpose - not created to just exist. We need remember that we are enough as we are and nothing can prove otherwise. Today journal your strengths, your passions, and your loves to remind yourself of who you really are. Peace, love, & joy!

The guys went camping and the girls had a slumber party! We had a great night filled with junk food and fun. We made cupcakes, hotdogs, pizza, and had an assortment of chips and candy. Our drinks were rootbeer and orangesicle floats with mustache straws to add to the fun. The best part about making cupcakes! We started off with with games. The first one was Twister Moves - not as fun as the original Twister, but we tried. Next, How Well Do You Know Me. I typed up 20 questions and put everyone's name on the paper and passed them out. No one knew who had their name until the end. I also typed up titles of movies, songs, and tv shows...cut them out, folded them and placed them in a can. We split up into teams and had 60 seconds to give clues and guess. Our last game was several rounds of Catch Phrase. For all of you that know us Murray Girls you know we can't end a party without having a dance competition. So we picked our dance team, and had a few minutes to pract...

Today I'm preparing for a slumber party that I'm hosting Saturday with all the girls in the family. When I asked my 7th grade granddaughter if she wanted to have a slumber party, her response was, What's that?" We both had a look of confusion on our face until I responded with, " sleepover?"  I wasn't sure if that was what they're calling it these days since me using the words slumber party was like I spoke a foreign language to her, but she said, "Oh, OK!"  I   have to admit for a brief moment I actually felt old. Although, I am doing it old school with charades, twister, junk food, old movies, old music, and a possible pillow fight! Yup! I'm taking it back. This party has an age range of 4 - 55...wish me luck! Peace, Love & Hug!

I watched a touching video today about an 11 year old girl and her father. http://www.sunnyskyz.com/good-news/610/Dying-Father-Sees-His-11-Year-Old-Down-The-isle I posted it on my facebook (Murraytalk), but it's such a beautiful story and video I wanted to share it on my blog in hopes of it reaching more people. Enjoy!

We all overthink at times, but it becomes a problem when overthinking starts getting in the way of us making good decisions or causes undue worry. I've spent the past five days witnessing how overthinking can strip a person of their happiness. What started out as a simple thought, turned into a mountain of thoughts which triggered some memories and led to a downward spiral. It created a stage of self - hatred and problems that weren't there. I'm hoping and praying that the negative thoughts are slowly being chiseled down. You can't allow overthinking to consume your mind. It robs your sleep, steals your happiness, and paralyzes your thought process. It becomes a war in your head. Think happy thoughts! I know that's easier said than done, but practice, practice, practice! When you think something positive everyday throughout the day, eventually the happy thoughts will come naturally.  "We are addicted to our thoughts. We cannot change anything if we...

Happy Wednesday  - It's a brand new day! I love this song, Brand New Day by Joshua Radin. The lyrics have a powerful message and the video hopefully will bring a smile to your face. Be happy and thankful that you've been blessed with another...make the most of your best today! Peace, Love, & Hugs!

Lately I seem to be surrounded by hurting people that are spiraling deeper and deeper to a dark place. I worry if they'll be able to climb out. It's such a difficult situation for me to be in because I can't make someone believe that their life is becoming unmanageable if they refuse to acknowledge it. Going through the motions and pretending that life is good is like putting a band aid on a deep wound that requires a whole lot more. I've been there and what happens is eventually you crack. Fortunately for me it made me what to change my life, but I've had friends that gave up the fight - they just couldn't see the light anymore. I know how easy it is to get stuck in the past and allow old memories to take over our thoughts and our life, but we have to focus on the positive things that will lift us up and keep us moving forward. There's always something positive to hold on to everyday, something to make us smile again. Find your something and embrace ...